


Metrosexual

by whowantstheworld



Category: South Park
Genre: M/M, dip - Freeform, south park - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-12 04:35:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15331899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whowantstheworld/pseuds/whowantstheworld
Summary: Takes place during the Metrosexual fad. Pip/Damien borderline M for some suggestive stuff. written out of boredom





	Metrosexual

Authors note: I know I’m jumping way ahead from my other story. But I’ve had this idea for a while now and had to finish it. I took a break from the other story I started to write this cause this was funny to write. Takes place during the whole metrosexual fad. Rated T maybe borderline M for suggestive boy/boy stuff. (DIP) If that isn’t your thing then just skip :D. This is probably the most yaoi thing I’ve ever written so please bear with me.

Metrosexual

“Come on Pip what’s taking you so long?” Butters said tapping his feet impatiently as he stood next to the fitting room door with his arms crossed.

“I feel rather silly wearing this, Butters” Pip answered through the other side of the door.

“Come on Pip Jimmy and Timmy are waiting for us over by the food court”

“I know. I just don’t think I can wear this” Pip says sticking his head out of the fitting room.

“Why yes you can girlfriend! Come on let me see” Butters protested.

Pip scans his eyes left and right then reveals his outfit for Butters to see. Butters looks at his friend up and down with an approving look. “You look great Pip!”

“I do?” Pip asks looking down at his black and white long sleeve top that exposed his navel.

“Sure that outfit looks great on you!” Butters complimented.

“I’m not sure I know how to be… metrosexual” The Brit turned around to look at the back of his grey tight fitting bell bottom pants.

“Of coarse you do. We’ll show you. That outfit screams seventies chic. And just think what Damien will think when he sees your new makeover”

Pip thought for a moment after Butters said that. What would Damien think? The prince of darkness’ son usually failed at trying to be romantic. Maybe this makeover would help spice things up. 

“Okay!” Butters clapped his hands “lesson one: The walk. You want to work it when you walk” He then went on to showing Pip the Cat Walk and some more sassy struts and poses. “That’s it. Work it!” Butters encouraged Pip on as he mimicked Butters’ moves.

“Do you really think Damien will like this?” Pip asked, his eyes scanning down at the silly looking outfit.

“Of coarse he will” Butters beamed positively. “You need to get out of your shell more often Pip”  
Maybe Butters was right. This could be fun after all. Damien loved him and his boring old clothes no matter what but it was time to change things up. The Brit smiled to himself. “Right-o then. I may need more work on my struts though”

“No worries girlfriend. You’ll pick it up quick” Butters said while checking his pink top and short black shorts in the mirror. “Isn’t this the cutest outfit Pip?” He then proceeded to fixing his newly styled blonde locks brushing them to the side. Pip looked at Butters’ outfit. He was just glad that his outfit wasn’t as flashy and outrages as Butters’ and the others. Even if his showed more skin than he wanted to.

‘It looks nice” he responded not really knowing what else to say.

“Oh and another thing” Butters turned to Pip and snatched that boring old brown Gatsby cap off his head. “We need to get you a new hat. It doesn’t match with your outfit"

“Oh I guess not..” Butters returned it to Pip to hold onto.

“Once we meet up with Jimmy and Timmy we’ll go get you a cute matching cap and go to the salon to get your hair done” They paid at the counter and Butters then took Pip by the arm and made their way to the food court. There Jimmy and Timmy were already waiting for Pip and Butters. They already had their make overs too.

“Wh-wh-what took you ladies so long?” Jimmy asked.

“I was helping Pip here pick out a cute outfit. Wait ‘till you guys see it! We just need to find him another cap and get his hair done. You guys want to come?”

“Actually me and Tim have to get going soon. Why don’t you meet us back at my house. We are going to catch up on a game we’re finishing"

“Okay we’ll be there in an hour then” Butters responded. Timmy and Jimmy both got up and left in their new metrosexual attires as well.

“Let’s go get you done Pip!” Butters exclaimed taking him by the arm once more. They arrived at the hat store which had all types of hats, caps, berets all different sizes and colors. One of them caught Butters’ attention instantly. It was a zebra patterned cap similar to the one Pip wore. “Try this one on” Pip put on the cap and looked in the mirror in front of him. “What do you think? It matches well with your outfit”

“I suppose” Pip smiled. He still thought it would look silly but he played along anyway. The two boys then headed to the accessories area of the store and something else caught his eye. It was a bronze necklace with the male symbol in the front. “Put this on” Butters handed the chain to Pip. Pip obliged noticing the symbol on the necklace.

“I’ll look like Austin Powers” The blonde complained glancing again at the mirror.  
“Nonsense It will look great with the open shirt of your outfit. Come on let’s pay for this and go get your hair done”

Pip and Butters finally made it to the salon that was at the first level of the mall. Pip was hesitant to get his hair done on a count of he’d never had it styled any way other than his usual bobbed haircut. He sat on the chair and a red curly haired woman with flashy earrings grabbed the scissors and began her work on Pip’s hair. He opted not to get his hair shampooed since he already washed it earlier that morning. Butters had shown Pip the styling book beforehand to see which one he liked. He wasn’t sure so he picked a random one, obviously from the ladies hair styles. “Oh bother” he said to himself as the stylist lady trimmed the ends of his golden locks. After the lady was done cutting and blow drying she turned Pip around his chair so he could see himself. “What do ya think?”

“I think it looks great!” Butters chimed in

Pip looked at himself again not knowing what to sat other than a “thank you” to the lady. His golden locks had been styled to fit against his face and his bangs had been blow dried fluffy and styled and parted so they can fall over his right eye. The two boys paid and headed to Jimmy’s house. There Pip would see how he looked in his whole ensemble. When they arrived Jimmy and Timmy were just finishing their game. They were getting ready to eat something Jimmy’s mom had made for dinner. Butters encouraged Pip to try his outfit on so that he Jimmy and Timmy could see it. Pip went to the bathroom with the bag of clothing in his hand. He changed and looked at the mirror in front of him wondering what on earth Damien would think. He turned around to look at his backside. He had to admit he did look good and felt a bit of confidence. It made him feel almost…cool and hip. He fixed the zebra patterned hat and winked at the mirror then blowing a kiss at himself. He studied how the other boys were talking and all the metrosexual poses and slangs they used with each other. He put a finger on his chin and a little smile crept over his lips.  
He went out to the living room and when the other three turned around they were surprised by how good Pip looked. Butters gave a teasing whistle.

“W-w-wow Pip y-you look g-great!” Jimmy complimented.

“Oh..Timmy” Timmy added in a gay tone.

“Thanks lads” Pip laughed “Do you think so?”

“Of course you look great! We all do” Butters said

“I’ll take your word for it” Pip grinned. “This was fun but I have to get going” he looks at the clock hanging on the wall. It was seven-thirty.

“A-aren’t you staying for dinner?” Jimmy asked.

“I’d like to but Damien will be arriving back from Hell soon and I’d kind of like to have dinner with him” 

“Okay no problem. Have fun. I’m sure Damien will” The crippled kid teased with a wink.  
Pip covered his mouth at the joke.

“Go get ‘em tiger!” Butters cheered him as he led his friend out the door but not before throwing in some more goodies into Pip’s bag. “Here’s some extra conditioners to keep your hair soft..and also this spray mist of lavender may come in handy” Butters gave him a nudge in the arm.

“Alrighty then I must get going . ta!” Pip waved at his three friends and left to his and Damien’s house. Damien should be arriving by eight. He left to hell to help Satan with some issues down there that had to do with processing newcomers. He wasn’t sure what to make for dinner considering it was already a bit late and there wasn’t anything in the fridge to make except a sandwich. Pip’s eyes then averted to the mirror in the living room. He wanted to check himself out again to make sure his hair was presentable. He never thought he could look this good. Just then he got an idea. A ridiculous but fun idea. He had been watching more sappy movies lately and he thought attempting to be a bit more romantic wouldn’t hurt. Damien was still getting used to the mushiness. He only ever showed affection when the two were alone at home. He was getting better at cuddling that’s for sure. Pip walked over to the stereo and put some slow music to set up the mood. It was a mix CD he had made of cheesy 70s and 80s love songs.  
He thought of what Butters taught him at the mall with poses and struts and then grabbed the body mist and sprayed it all over himself. “That should do it” Pip said to himself with a smile as he placed the bottle down. He turned the lights down of the living room and went over to their room to wait until Damien arrived. It didn’t take long enough to hear the door open and hear his high pitched voice echo through.

“Pip Pip I’m home” he called out. He sat down on the couch to take off his shoes. I would have been here earlier but my dad had me do some of his stupid paper work for processing new comers to Hell” he walked over to the refrigerator to grab a soda. Damien gulped the drink and continued explaining when he looked up towards the door way to see Pip standing there, one hip sticking out and his arm leaning against the side of the wall.

“’Ello Damien love” Pip said in a low but sultry tone. As if on cue Marvin Gaye’s Let’s get it on started playing on the stereo. Damien spat some of his soda out almost choking in the process.  
¬  
“Pip?” he nearly dropped the can on the floor.

“Yes love?” Pip stepped forward and walked to his boyfriend. He wrapped his arms around his neck then his shoulders pushing Damien back down on the couch. He sat on his lap straddling him as he faced him.

Damien didn’t even have time to react to Pip’s actions. ‘Pip w-what are you wearing?” he didn’t know whether to laugh but this new display of affection was sure okay with the devil’s son.

“Do you like it?” Pip asked toying his fingers through Damien’s black messy hair.

“Um sure” his voice cracked. “You look good..really good” He gave Pip a devilish grin and wrapped his hands around Pip’s waist bringing him closer. The Brit smirked as he leaned in to kiss his boyfriend on the lips. It was a soft gentle kiss that lasted a few seconds until they parted. “Okay where’s Pip and what have you done with him” the antichrist asked jokingly but was still confused as to what was going on.

“Nothing. Can’t I be a little affectionate once in a while?”

“Affectionate? Pip you’re always affectionate. I mean the get up. Also are you wearing lip gloss?” Damien licked his lips tasting the cherry flavored gloss lingering over his mouth.

“Yes Butters gave it to me. We went out to the mall and bought new clothing. I believe it’s called metrosexual”

The noirette raised one thick eyebrow at him. He didn’t know what happened while he was gone but this new look of Pip’s was certainly a turn on nonetheless.  
“Well then you sure as hell do look hot like this” he teased Pip by running his hand up and down his exposed navel then stopping down at the zipper of those grey pants of his.

“Damien” Pip jumped at his touch his face already turning two shades of red. The pair leaned in once more to give each other a deeper kiss than the last. Pip let out a soft moan under his throat in which turned Damien on more. He allowed an escaped sigh of his own. Pip’s body pressed close to his. He moved his hands from the blonde’s waist to his lower backside and pausing right at the top of his pants. He sneakily slid his fingers down through them to get a feel of Pip’s underwear. It felt like spandex Damien thought. Pip didn’t seem to mind one bit as Damien’s hands pushed down further to his butt. He then felt Pip’s pants loosen up allowing more space for his hands to roam. Damien looked down to see that he had unzipped the front of his pants on purpose.  
Damien gave Pip a lustful grin as the blonde moved in to allow him to continue. The noirette couldn’t help but be more turned on than ever before. This was the most intimate he and Pip had ever been since starting to date. Damien nuzzled the nape of his neck. He smelled of lavender turning on all his five senses to the upmost level.

“You smell good” he muttered softly.

Pip tilted his head to the side as he continued stroking his boyfriend’s hair gently.  
“It’s lavender” Pip whispered feeling giddy. He was becoming more turned on himself at Damien’s touch.

“What underwear are you wearing?” Damien asked, his carnal instincts clearly taking over.

“Would you like to find out?” Pip said in a seductive tone. There was a fire in his eyes that Damien had never seen before.

Before he or Pip could say another word Damien got up lifting Pip up then proceeded carrying him bridal style to their room. Pip let out a yelp as Damien then dropped him gently onto the bed. He then pinned him down holding on to his wrists. Looking down at his lover who looked beautiful as ever. Pip could almost pass as a beautiful blonde girl.. almost. The fact he was a boy is what turned him on all the more.

“Damien?’ Pip whispered . Damien could feel him shudder a bit underneath.

“I want you babe” he moved in caressing Pip’s exposed neck once more with kisses and small bites.

“Mmm Damien…” he said barely audible. “I want you too”

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The modest Pip had indeed a lustful side to him. And only he would be the one to share with his beloved. He could feel his heart pounding off his chest. The combination of lust and emotions would seem overwhelming to the antichrist but at this moment it did not matter. Both their energies radiated off each other.

Pip looked up to Damien’s eyes. They were burning with that fire he usually showed when upset although it wasn’t anger at all. It was hunger. It was lust. Damien was devilishly handsome and cute at the same time.

“I love you Damien..” Pip said lovingly.

Damien looked into his soft bluish eyes. The pureness of his words and hearing that L word used for only him threw him over the edge.

“I love you too Pip”

It was rare he ever used the word in all the time they had been dating even. But he meant it.  
He then pressed his body against Pip. Pip’s whole body tensed and his face flustered from what seemed like a slight bulge pressing onto his leg. Damien was indeed turned on and so was he.  
As soon as Damien released on of his wrists from his grip, Pip wrapped his arm around his neck.

“So about that underwear” Damien said seductively looking down at him with a grin. He moved his hand down to the already unzipped pants and slid his hand down cupping the bulge underneath. Pip squirmed underneath to Damien’s delight. He was really cute when he was vulnerable.

“Ugh Damien” he moaned as Damien gently massaged his bulge up and down with his palm. Pip began to slowly buck his hips to the rhythm of the massage. He pressed his lips onto Pip’s as the two made out passionately once again, more audible moaning escaping both boys’ throats. Damien was getting impatient so he unzipped his own pants and took Pip’s hand bringing it down to them. Pip backed his hand unsure at first. Maybe they were rushing this too fast.  
He then felt Pip’s hand relax and then allowed Damien to place it over his own bulge. Pip took the signal and began caressing his hand up and down his boyfriend’s underwear. The two continued their tongue wrestling for another minute or so still rubbing each other intimately. As they kissed Damien began pulling Pips pants and underwear down wanting to see his love in all his naked glory.

Suddenly there was a loud bang on the front door. The two boys bolted up in a second startled and panting from the noise.

*BANG BANG*

“Oh dear” Pip said to himself flabbergasted.

“Who the hell is it?” Damien asked aloud feeling a bit light headed and irritated at the same time. Who dares to interrupt his private moment with Pip.

“Are you blokes there?” a familiar voice came from the outside of the front door. “Pip? Damien?”  
Damien grumbled then cursed himself mentally.

“Damien.. I think we should open the door for Gregory.” Pip said awkwardly starring down “Why are they here anyway?”

“Shit I forgot I told Gregory and Christophe to meet us here when I got back to go to that new burger joint twenty minutes from here. Ugh”

“Oh. Well then no worries love..” Pip placed his hand on Damien’s cheek. “We can continue this another time yes?” he then kissed him tenderly on the lips. He could tell Damien felt disappointed that their moment was ruined. Pip felt the same as well but they would just have to wait.  
Luckily Damien’s arousal was wearing down as was Pip’s. Pip put his zebra hat on and zipped his pants up as did Damien.

“Come on. Let’s open the door for these bastards” Damien said half joking and half annoyed. He took Pip by the hand and made him turn to him. He planted a last kiss on Pip in which the blonde smiled softly at him. “We better continue where we left off” he smirked

“ Yes Damien kins” Pip gave him a playful wink.  
He really did love this new Pip.

Damien and Pip opened the door and there stood Gregory and Christophe waiting impatiently. “Wat took you so long?”Christophe said throwing out the cigarette butt from his mouth and to the floor. “And wat iz wiz zee outfit?” he pointed at Pip.  
Pip rolled his eyes. He still couldn’t stand Christophe at times being French and all. However the four of them have grown to be somewhat of a family by now so Pip usually ignored his snarky remarks.

“We thought you two had forgotten we were supposed to go to the new Burger joint that opened near Denver” Gregory added.

“No we didn’t. We were just busy” Damien looked at Pip who blushed furiously in return.

“Yes he means busy as in cleaning right love?” Pip nudged Damien in the arm. “Oh. yeah” Damien just smirked at the two other boys.

“Whatever can we get going? We need to catch zee train that iz leaving soon. Come on” Christophe said impatiently.

So the four boys left off to somewhere near Denver to the new Burger place they’d been anticipating.

*****BONUS*******

“Come on Damien please?” Pip pleaded

“No. Hell no” Damien said walking a faster pace than Pip. Pip caught up to his boyfriend.

“Please just do this one little thing for me?” Pip gave him those puppy dog eyes again. Damien still remained firm in his response.

“No Pip I’m not trying on any metrosexual outfit and that’s that!” Damien yelled in that squeaky raspy voice of his.

“But I think you would look great” Pip said in his defense

“I don’t care. You’re not catching me in any stupid outfit” The little stubborn anti christ crossed his arms as they stopped near the food court. He noticed all the other young boys and grown men all clean and metrosexual running around the mall looking for all the sales going on. Not that he cared if everyone went metro, hell he LOVED Pip’s makeover he just didn’t want himself looking like that. He’s the son of Satan for crying out loud!

“Damien” Pip leaned in close to his space. “If you do this for me I’ll reward you with something…” Pip moved his eyes down to Damien’s pants giving him a hint. Damien grinned and took Pip’s silly zebra hat off his head. “Oh yeah? What kind of reward?”

“You’ll find out later tonight. That is if you don’t want to” Pip then started walking away from him.

“Wait. Pip!”

*At Hot Topic*

“Damien Hot Topic is not metrosexual!” Pip protested

“Says who? And if I’m doing this I’m doing this my way” 

Damien could be so whiny Pip thought. “Fine” he agreed to at least let him choose his own outfit  
“I pick this one because it’s black” Damien pulled a black shiny leather tank top from the clearance section. He didn’t know if it was men’s or women’s and frankly he didn’t give a shit. It looked metro enough.

“Oh Damien! How about these?” Pip hollered showing off some brown leopard pattern tight pants. “Try these on”

Damien rolled his eyes at the atrocity before him. “Pip you’re crazy. I’m not wearing that”

“Yes you are. Get in the changing room now!” Pip threw the pants at Damien and pushed him over to the fitting room.

Pip was sure persistent in getting him to go Mterosexual. Why the hell for? He just wanted to get this pathetic thing over with and get his reward.  
Damien was done trying out the ensemble and he opened the door to show Pip. “There it fits can we go?” he then closed the door quick so no one else would see him.  
Pip clapped his hands happily at the tight fitting clothes. They paid the clerk and then it was off to get his hair done. This took another five minutes of convincing Damien but eventually he agreed. His hair was done and styled all spikey with his sideburns flattened. His hair stunk of shampoo,spray and who knows what else. He looked at the mirror and thought the hair wasn’t too bad looking but still thought his old style looks cooler. Then after the salon they stopped by a kiosk in the middle of the mall that sold all types of fashionable colored glasses.

“Look Damien I think these would look great on you!” Pip chirped holding a pair of purple see through sunglasses.

The antichrist rolled his eyes. “How much are they? I’m not paying more than twenty on these” he said putting them on. His mean expression still plastered on his face.

“You look great love” Pip complimented but Damien was starting to get frustrated and he knew it.  
After they got the glasses which Damien had no choice but to wear them now, they stopped by a Pagoda jewelry kiosk.

“I’m getting my ear pierced” Damien said flatly. Pip blinked a bit shocked at his choice.

“Why?” Pip asked.

“Well if I’m going metro might as well seal the deal with a gay earring right?”

Pip just loved his boyfriend’s sarcasticness sometimes.  
Damien sat at the chair as the piercing lady went to work making a permanent hole in his left ear with the little gun machine. He would have had it pierced at a tattoo shop instead but at this point it didn’t matter.

“There I’m all metrosexual. Are we done?” Damien asked not knowing what came next

“You have to put the clothes on” Pip said in a stern fashion.

“Why?” Damien nagged. “I already did. This is getting stupid already”

Pip sighed. It was like trying to persuade a five year old. “Please Damien. The point is to see the whole outfit!”

He wanted to make Pip shut up already so he snatched the Hot Topic bag from Pip’s hand and went to change in one of the bathrooms. Luckily for him everyone in town was looking as ridiculous as he was so at least he wouldn’t seem like the only one to draw attention. Damien mumbled annoyingly to himself as he changed. Pip’s reward better be worth it. He was doing Pip a HUGE favor by dressing up like this.  
He came out of the bathroom in the whole get up and Pip squealed like a fan girl. Damien looked HOT. He could pass as a member from the Backstreet Boys.

“You look great love!” Pip said interlocking his arm with his. Damien wanted to push him away but didn’t.

“Yeah yeah..can we go?”

“Let’s get some food first I’m starving” Pip suggested

Damien just wanted to go and he didn’t want anyone else to see him wearing this. But it was too late Cartman and the gang had spotted the two boys from afar and went up to them to say Hi.

“Well well if it isn’t little limey and freak boy” Cartman taunted.

“What the hell do you shits want?” Damien snapped back at the foursome.

“Oh we’d thought we just check out your little outfits here. You two look gay as hell” Damien gritted his teeth annoyed at the fat ass boy. “But not as gay as us!” Cartman retorted

“I’ll give you till the count of three to get your asses out of here” Damien asserted with a flame growing on his finger as a warning. “If not I will turn you all into beasts of burden”

Pip clutched onto Damien’s arm to prevent him from harming the other boys. “Just ignore them love” 

Damien huffed then turned around to walk the other direction knowing it wasn’t worth it. Those infidels.

“Hmmpff FAGS!’ Cartman yelled from the back.

The antichrist itched to turn the fat ass into a piece of lard but held back as Pip followed with his arm interlocked to his.

The two grabbed something at the food court and ate.

~~Later that night~~

Damien and Pip were cuddling in bed watching something random on TV. After what seemed like a never ending day Damien was glad to be out of those ridiculous clothes. Pip caressed his boyfriend’s hair which was back to his old style. “I miss the spikey hair already” Pip said.

“Shut up” Damien retorted

Pip giggled and moved in front of him to face him. “I guess I should give you your reward now” Pip moved his finger in a circular motion over Damien’s chest. For a brief moment the antichrist had almost forgotten all about their little deal earlier only because he was just getting tired from running around in that damn mall all day.

“I guess you should” he grinned.

“Well then since you’ve been such a good lad..” Pip leaned and kissed him quickly. “I shall give it to you” The brit cooed into his ear.

Damien knew where this was going so he grabbed Pip and flipped him over on his backside so he would be hovering on top of him.

“Looks like I’m getting my reward indeed” He stared down at him with that devilish grin. He crushed his lips with Pip’s for the umpteenth time. Pip wrapped his arms around him reveling in Damien’s intoxicating scent of his cologne.

“Do me Damien..” The way Pip said it pushed him off the edge. He chuckled softly and began unzipping and untying any and all articles of clothing including his own dropping all of it to the floor. He threw the warm comforter over both their bodies and the two boys kissed passionately allowing themselves to explore the other in any way they wanted and nothing or nobody would interrupt them this time. Maybe this metrosexual stuff isn’t bad after all Damien thought.  
~~~~~~~~  
Another note: Pip and Damien do live together which will be explained in the early fic I’m still finishing.  
Thanks for reading this garbage :D


End file.
